Why does Love hurt?


Why does love hurt?

Love is a profound word to some. I have oftentimes heard from a lot of people that it is not easy for them to say ‘I love you, because it brings a different intensity into a relationship. I wonder if it’s really true.
Indeed love is profound and should not be treated ever so lightly. But I believe that people who have these thoughts are the ones who have been through love many times or someone who has seen love along the way. Those who probably might have been hurt by love a couple of times. Loving and being hurt in the end creates a wound that does not heal with a blink of an eye.

Love is a natural wonderful feeling but it is so powerful that it can also cause us pain and there will never be any proper advice how to deal with the kind of pain it inflicts. Love hurts when there is no right foundation, when trust is betrayed, when there is no respect and when love is lost. It hurts us because we are human beings and nothing can ever prepare us for this feeling because it just comes out naturally even without inviting it.

Love creates an overwhelming feeling that envelopes us and makes us very protective of the love we have. It hurts because we don’t stop thinking of ways to keep the love burning, to keep it safe. It is even more devastating when efforts prove to become futile when the love you give is not reciprocated. You can never win the game of love when there is only side of it. It is truly the saddest part of love.

Love knows no boundaries and I wish we all should be aware of this. We simply cannot avoid getting hurt, but as the saying goes, ‘it is better to love than to have never loved at all’.

Author: Joan

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29 Responses

  1. Kermit Hale

    December 5, 2010 1:46 am

    “It is better to have loved and lost (or be hurt by it) than to never have loved at all” is the real saying. And I like the mention about losing love…for that is one of two ways it hurts. Love itself does not hurt anyone. Love not returned can seem hopeless or forlorn, but the love you love is not that, it is the absence of a returned love that does the hurting. The other kind of hurt is when a returning love dies or grows cold, again it is the fact that it stops or does not come back that does the hurting. This is important, for then we do not confuse the hurting with the loving; and we can then dare to love again.

    • Cheri

      August 13, 2012 7:53 am

      Very well said! After reading that particular post , from Kermit Hale, it truly put things in perspective. It also helped lift some of the pain I personally have been experiencing from what was described in that blog. Thank you for sharing your wisdom Kermit.

  2. Soma

    October 28, 2011 7:59 am

    Love is nothing just a mentality that comes in human minds . When we see someone who is too attractive our heartbeat becomes faster this all happens because we belive in looooooooooooooooove.

    • sahil

      December 27, 2012 7:00 am

      hmmm but when u give 100 % to some one..u will get nothing..thts true…if u want to get ur love never express ur love

  3. Alia

    January 6, 2012 11:39 pm

    love hurts you no matter what thats my opinion
    but its amazing the feeling we feel.
    and its beautiful how it just gets stronger everyday
    even the hard times we go through that only brings us closer
    to trust in ourselves and to trust him/her
    no one can ever find the definition of love until you feel it and live it
    ” love was just a word until you came along and gave it a meaning”
    its true. every love has a different meaning to different people who have expierenced it… dont give up love its your only reality… its a dream come true for people its living it with the person you love and want to be with forever! and giving up your life and when your heart belongs to the person….. love is beautiful,amazing,wonderful…. its feelings you can never put in to words that make sense……..

    • Fabian

      January 10, 2012 6:14 pm

      I wonder when I see some people get scared of love. “love is life, and since it is you cant fear it; simply to it is to fear life and one who fears life is three times died”. So I dont expect 2c u guyz died just only coz of fear! Look if you are alive or not!

  4. Ernest Walter Lim

    May 3, 2012 1:24 am

    Everyone says love hurts, but that is not true. Loneliness hurts. Rejection hurts. Losing someone hurts. Envy hurts. Everyone gets these things confused with love, but in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all pain and makes someone feel wonderful again. Love is the only thing in this world that does not hurt.

    • Ashley

      June 29, 2012 12:49 pm

      I could not agreee more with Ernest Walter Lim. Most people believe the opposite of love is hate. That isn’t true, it takes more time, effort, & energy to hate someone rather than to love.

  5. mark.dajong.tumbapo

    July 19, 2012 4:09 am

    i was in love for a long period and had most beautiful time of our life..but the things were not always the same…she live in nepal whereas me i was doing my work in india…she starts to ignoring me and that hurt the most as i never thot that she would something like that…we have promised each other never to leave but now everything is gone and it makes me miserable…

  6. Ashley Gillis

    October 2, 2012 3:47 am

    I think love doesnt hurt. I think it does tie into paid tho. People get rapped up in their own needs or get overly protective of the one they love which causes the pain of love. No relationship is perfect. No one is perfect. I believe u gota find that one person that has the most in common with u and their flaws u gota learn to b willing to live with and eventually come to love. Everyone will love and lose one way or another. Everyone will get a heartbreak or 2 in their life time but i believe u can’t lose hope in love. Everything happens for a reason. All u ppl that say uve been hurt… take it as a lesson to appreciate that special sumone that will love u the way u love them…. I’m a diehard hopeless romantic tho LOL …. if u give love u will recieve it. Do on to others as u wish done on to u 😉

  7. Protap

    December 29, 2012 8:37 pm

    Yeah! Its true that love doesn’t hurt.. But sometime we get hurt when we love someone and if that person can’t accept our love then that love will turn into hurt..;-(

    • brianna

      January 25, 2013 12:07 pm

      love does hurt
      you can like someone but they dont like you back
      i have been there
      it takes some time to calm down but it will be fine

  8. neb48000

    January 16, 2013 7:24 am

    well all i ever wanted was to be loved by the one i loved…. love has always been so beautiful in the beginning but painful in the long run …the more you truly love ,the more is the hurt…… lucky are those who hav found love that love them back as they do

  9. brianna

    January 25, 2013 12:05 pm

    love hurts because there are hard differences beetween it girl.
    you can like someone and they dont like you
    i have been there girl

  10. Anonymous

    August 12, 2013 10:27 pm

    AFTER being with someone for so long and get REJECTED at the end.
    He chose someone else over me…it’s been 10 years and my pain is still fresh

  11. loretta

    March 15, 2014 1:40 am

    I have not read all responses but i am sure all have experienced love in one shape form or fashion. Until recently at 44, i have truly felt love because i feel it in my gut,not in my heart. I think with this, no matter that feeling cant be replaced by any other. Unfortunately the fear of losing it is setting in and that hurts more than anything, the unknown, not being assured. I would rather lose out right away than to feel what i feel and be terrified when i allow myself to put my gut into it “ITS NOT REAL”. Sorry guys and gals thats my hurt. Thanks for reading. God bless

  12. andrea

    March 24, 2014 9:36 pm

    What hurts is when u loved some1 for a long time n then they moved away n made promises n left that hope that we are still gonna be together n nothings gonna come between us that no matter the distance our love will still grow but things changed he changed he betrayed my trust n now I feel as though I can never love again although I might have moved on just to get over that I still love him n still think about him its like its impossible to just forget him n he out there having the time of his life probably already 4get that I exist..I wonder sometimes if I’ll ever be able to love again

  13. andrea baugh

    April 1, 2014 1:49 am

    Love is what it sounds like staying and loving and hopefully
    Staying and loving with someone that will never leave you to feel alone again.

  14. andrea baugh

    April 1, 2014 1:53 am

    Thats great to know,thanks. I dont think its fair to let them hide in the dark and fair to bp either. I have new found respect for bp!

  15. Chanda

    April 17, 2014 5:57 am

    Most of the time we all want to be loved, feel loved, inasmuch as we love others in the same way. Love in its entirely should be reciprocal at all times, it does not help when not loved back by someone you care a lot for. It actually freaks you out because you will not know what that person is thinking about you be it family, friends, or lovers. I would like to suggest that emptiness, loneliness, is what makes us to love others and expect them to love us back. Love hurts and does not hurt at the same time, it is a wonderful feeling to feel loved by someone but sucks at the same time when not loved back.

  16. Chanda

    April 17, 2014 6:00 am

    What hurts the most from love is when you are willing to do anything for someone you love and care for and they do not grasp that nor even care and appreciate what you are doing for them. Sadly, by the time that person realizes it will be too late because that love will have gone searching for people who will appreciate it.


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